


Moonstruck

by RemyJane



Category: Men's Hockey RPF
Genre: Getting Together, Hunters, M/M, Prejudice, Werewolves, Young Guns Era, slowburn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-20
Updated: 2019-06-20
Packaged: 2020-05-15 09:29:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,944
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19292965
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RemyJane/pseuds/RemyJane
Summary: Alex grew up being told wolves were monsters, hearing stories from his grandfather about hunting them and seeing the giant wolf skin his grandfather kept in the den. He believed them all, of course. Why would his grandfather lie to him?Obviously, they were monsters; his grandfather had the scars to prove it.





	Moonstruck

Alex grew up being told wolves were monsters, hearing stories from his grandfather about hunting them and seeing the giant wolf skin his grandfather kept in the den. He believed them all, of course. Why would his grandfather lie to him?  
Obviously, they were monsters; his grandfather had the scars to prove it. 

Alex didn’t meet a wolf until he joined the NHL.

There were no wolves in Russia, not any longer. They’d been hunted out of existence there, or they’d fled. Wolves weren’t allowed to play professional sports, though the NHL had lifted the ban in the ‘80s. 

Alex had been warned to avoid the wolves. His grandmother hadn’t wanted him to go at all. She thought it was too dangerous to have wolves playing in the NHL. She worried that he’d get hurt, especially since the Capitals had wolves on their roster.

His mother had waited until he was getting ready to go to the airport, until they were alone, before she said anything. 

“You have such a big heart.” She told him quietly, a gentle hand on his cheek. “Don’t be too scared of people to love them.” He hadn’t known what she meant at the time.

Wolves were different than he’d thought they’d be. He expected to be able to immediately identify them, he thought they’d look somehow predatory. He expected them to be menacing or frightening, or somehow inhuman. 

Instead, the way he found out was when a reporter asked what he thought about his new teammate, Nicklas Backstrom, and how he was the highest drafted wolf in NHL history. 

He found out when his captain, Chris Clark, shouted at Nicklas and Mike Green to quit rough-housing at practice, ending with, “Goddamned pups.”

Mike and Nicky did look a bit like pups, with wide eyes and floppy hair, always pushing and shoving into each other, always together. Alex would never tell them he thought that, though. 

Alex fell in with them easily. Sasha Semin did too. 

There was nothing sinister about them, nothing that hinted at fangs and claws. Nicklas was soft, he was quick. He could find Alex on the ice anywhere, anytime, and Alex forgot he was a werewolf entirely as he threw himself into the blond after another goal. 

When Nicklas scored and a couple people howled loudly from the stands, he was reminded.

Nicky had a good sense of humor about it, shrugging and grinning sheepishly when reporters brought it up afterwards.“Always nice to have a pack.” He joked, glancing sideways at Mike. 

Mike approached Alex after the game, half dressed and chirping at Nicky over his shoulder. “Hey, you guys wanna come over? We’re gonna celebrate Nicky’s first goal.” He asked, bouncing on his toes. 

Alex shrugged. “Sure.” 

Sasha Semin chewed at his lip thoughtfully before nodding too. “Ok.” 

They spent the night drinking, sitting on the back deck even though it was a bit too cold. Nicky couldn’t seem to sit still, the rookie shifting restlessly in his seat and stretching and-

Mike squeezed his arm. “Jesus Christ, drink this.” He pushed his drink into Nicky’s hand. “You’re gonna drive me nuts.” 

Nicky took a sip and made a face. “Is this just straight rum?” He asked skeptically. 

“There’s some coke.” Mike defended himself, getting up to make himself another. 

Nicky took another sip, wrinkling his nose. Alex found it strangely cute. “You’re a bad bartender.” Nicky decided. 

When Mike sat back down, Nicky whispered something in his ear and Mike shrugged. “Maybe. Or just wait til they leave.” He whispered back, just a bit too loudly so that Alex heard. 

Sasha looked up too. “Everything ok?” He asked. 

Nicky went red and scowled at Mike. 

“Yeah it’s fine.” Mike said dismissively. “He just wants to change.”

“Change...clothes?” Alex asked. 

Nicky looked a bit indignant at that. “No.” He huffed. 

“What- oh.” Alex paused, glancing at the sky. “Not full moon.”

Mike laughed, though not meanly. “We don’t just change at the full moon.” He explained. “Sometimes...you know how when you haven’t skated for a while and then you do and it feels good? It’s like that.”

Alex nodded slowly. 

Sasha took a drink. “So, change.” He decided, entirely blasé about it.

“You don’t...you don’t mind?” Nicky glanced between the two Russians. 

Alex hadn’t considered that Nicky knew about what happened to wolves in Russia, but of course he did. If Alex had grown up hearing about wolves, then surely Nicky had grown up hearing about the hunters. His stomach turned at the thought; what did those stories sound like? He wasn’t sure he wanted to know. 

“Don’t mind.” Sasha repeated. “Like wolves.” He promised. Alex nodded; he wasn’t sure he wanted to hang out with actual wolves, but he was more curious than he was apprehensive. His grandmothers warnings came back to him, but he ignored them. 

Nicky looked at Mike, tilting his head. “I’m good.” Mike promised. Nicky disappeared inside and then returned minutes later, pushing the door open with his nose. 

He was a bit smaller than Alex would’ve pictured, but Nicky was young and maybe not fully grown. It twisted Alex’s stomach to think of how Nicky looked in relation to the wolf skin his grandfather had. 

His fur was tawny and his eyes still the same green as when he was human. They looked too intelligent, too thoughtful. He didn’t look wild, he didn’t look like a monster, even like this. Alex expected ruthless chaos and instead got something that didn’t appear threatening at all. 

“You like get pet?” Sasha asked, setting his drink aside. Sasha seemed unphased by this, and Alex wondered where he’d learned to be so comfortable. Or maybe Sasha was just jaded and wasn’t phased by anything anymore. 

Mike chuckled and nodded. The wolf- Nicky, Alex corrected himself- looked at Sasha and then at Mike. Mike rolled his eyes. “Go on.” He nudged him forward with his foot.

Nicky sat down in front of Sasha, gently resting his head on his knee. Alex found himself holding his breath. Sasha pet his ears and Nicky’s eyes closed. “Oh, so soft.” Sasha murmured. “Thank you.”

Sasha pet his ears until Nicky was dozing against him. Alex had a tight grip on his glass, so tight he wondered vaguely if it would break. He felt sick to his stomach. 

Nicky didn’t look like a monster. He didn’t act like a monster. Monsters didn’t fall asleep getting their ears pet, monsters’ tails did not gently whap against Alex’s chair in contentment. 

What had his grandfather really done?

Alex didn’t sleep well that night. He tossed and turned, unable to get comfortable. Finally, he sat up, pushing the covers back. 

He pulled out the box of old photos from under his bed; his grandmother had given them to him so he wouldn’t forget where he came from. He flipped through them again, remembering. Remembering, but differently. 

Remembering the thick silver ring he’d been given, that he wore, that his grandfather had worn. How his grandfather would insist on shaking hands with everyone, staring intently into their eyes. 

Alex twisted the ring on his finger. 

Silver wasn’t a myth. He knew that much. If he touched Nicky or Mike with his ring he would hurt them. He thought again about Nicky getting his ears pet, about Mike and Nicky playing on the ice. 

He dropped the ring into the box, a pale stripe on his finger in its place. 

They were his teammates, his friends, he reasoned. He couldn’t carry around something that would hurt them. 

It wasn’t just that though. It wasn’t just that. It was also the way he caught Nicky looking at him, the way he found himself watching Nicky. There was a chance it was nothing; there was a chance it was something. He wanted to find out and he couldn’t do that with a literal weapon on his hand.

Finally, he managed to fall asleep, dreaming of being chased through the woods. He woke up still tired, his mind muddy and unfocused. 

Michael Nylander, and therefore by extension Nicky, hosted a team dinner. 

The Nylanders were wolves. It hadn’t occurred to Alex that young wolves existed, but after people had started to clear out, the children changed and emerged from the house as pups. The house was outside the city and it sat on a bit of land. Alex thought there was a creek at the back of the property, hidden under the yellowing canopy of trees. 

All the Nylander pups were light in color, some of their ears still floppy, and Alex had never seen anything quite so cute as a baby wolf, it turned out. If Nicky wasn’t threatening looking, then the pups were downright adorable. 

The youngest rolled over on her back so he could pet her belly, still soft with puppy fuzz. 

Another of them, he believed it was William but he wasn’t sure, raced up to him and playfully nipped at his shoes. Alex laughed but Nicky frowned sternly, swatting the pup on the bum. 

“Don’t bite.” He scolded. The pup cocked his head, looking annoyed. Nicky glanced at Alex and then back down. “You know better.” He said quietly. 

William made a grumbling sort of whine and Alex had to cover his mouth to keep from actually laughing. 

“It’s ok.” He said to Nicky. 

Nicky shook his head. “He knows better.” Then, to the pup. “Go play.” 

William caught the bottom of Nicky’s pants leg in his mouth and tugged playfully, eyes glinting with mischief. 

Nicky scooped him up in his arms all at once, an impressive feat since the pup was already the size of a mid-sized dog. Alex found himself briefly distracted by the muscles in Nicky’s forearms. William whined and squirmed in protest. 

Nicky plopped the pup down in the grass. “Go play.” He repeated. 

The pup whined at him and yipped, circling him. Nicky looked amused as he crossed his arms. “I’ll play in a bit.” He promised. 

He returned to the deck and sat beside Alex at the table, a beer in hand. Alex wanted to say something, wanted to ask something, but he wasn’t sure what. 

Anything clever he may have thought of was interrupted when a big dark brown wolf came barreling out of the house, jumping up on Nicky and licking his face. 

Alex snagged his beer at the last minute, keeping it from spilling. 

“Ack, no!” Nicky laughed, shoving the wolf away. “Your breath is bad, stop it.” That earned him a deliberate lick up the side of his face, dampening a few stray curls. “I hate you.” Nicky muttered, even as he started to pet the wolf. 

“That Greenie?” Alex guessed. 

“Yeah.” Nicky nodded, scratching his ears. “You can tell, because he’s still an asshole.” He said sweetly. 

Mike growled at him softly and Nicky rolled his eyes. “Shush.” Mike has his front legs up on Nicky’s chair, and the blond wrapped an arm around him in a hug to appease him. That make his tail wag happily and he sat down again. 

After a bit more attention, Mike nudged at Nicky with his nose, trying to urge him up. 

Nicky gave Alex an apologetic look. “Sorry.” He said, disappearing inside. 

Mike hopped up in his chair, surprisingly graceful and careful despite his size. He set a paw on the arm of Alex’s chair and Alex reached out a tentative hand to pet him, grinning when Mike leaned into the touch. 

“You like, huh?” He said softly. “Much better like this, don’t talk.”

He whined at him in response and Alex laughed. 

Alex recognized Nicky’s wolf form as he came outside. He was less lightly colored than the Nylander pups, but substantially lighter than Mike. 

Mike perked up when he saw him and immediately gave chase. They tore off into the grass, heading towards the tree line. A couple pups chased after them. 

Alex took a drink of Nicky’s beer, watching them go. 

“Wolves are pack creatures.” Michael Nylander sat, sitting down beside him. He had the baby in his arms, and she was eagerly drinking from a bottle. “It’s been good for Nicky, I think, to have the kids and Greenie around.” 

“Yeah?”

“It’s hard to leave your whole family behind.” Michael shrugged. “You know that.”

Alex did. He didn’t know what his family would say to him now, sitting with wolves and watching as they play-fought in the grass. “Yeah. Good. At first, Nicky was very...quiet.”

Michael nodded, his smile slowly slipping away. “What do you think of all this, Alex?” He asked. Meaning sparkled in his eyes and Alex felt his ears going hot despite himself.

Michael knew; Alex didn’t know how, but Michael knew. Maybe it was online somewhere. Maybe someone had mentioned it. Maybe he’d seen the silver ring, before Alex had thought to take it off. 

Reflexively, he looked down at his hand, where the pale stripe of skin still gleamed. 

“Don’t tell him.” He said quietly. 

“It’s not my place to say.” Michael promised obliquely. “But I’m not going to let you hurt him, either.”

“Don’t want to hurt anyone.” 

“Good.” Michael looked at him closely. “I hope you can see that whatever you heard growing up, we’re not like that.” 

Alex nodded, looking down. “I didn’t...there’s no wolves in Russia. I never meet one before.” He said quietly. 

“I know.” Michael said softly. “This is it. Packs are family. Wolves are social, no matter how shy Nicklas seems.” His lips quirked up in a smile at the teasing. 

Alex nodded. In the distance, he heard one of the wolves howl and another answer. Michael sighed heavily. “They’re playing in the creek again.” He said, sounding only slightly disapproving. 

He was right; shortly after dark, the whole group was back, wet and muddy and mostly tired out. Only Nicky and Mike still had energy to wrestle in the yard. 

Michael tossed a few towels at Alex and gave him a pointed look, which urged him down the steps and into the yard. 

Alex didn’t know much about wolves, but he did love animals. He held the towel out and Mike came galloping up to him, letting himself be dried off. 

Nicky sat just out of reach, looking skeptical even in his wolf form. 

Mike tugged the towel from his hands and ran off with it. Alex laughed, but was too distracted trying to coax Nicky into coming closer to watch him. 

“He’s just being a brat.” Mike said, towel around his waist. He grinned when Alex looked a bit surprised. “Changing is pretty fast.” Then, he looked at Nicky. “C’mere.” He held out his hands. 

Nicky shifted uneasily and finally came closer, letting Mike pet his ears and then drape the towel over him. “You’re such a baby.” Mike muttered fondly. 

Nicky’s ears went back a little, looking affronted. Alex was surprised how expressive wolves were, how communicative. It was further proof they weren’t monsters, further proof that what he’d been told was wrong. 

He thought of the picture of his grandfather, with two giant wolves strung up beside him. Had those wolves been friends, like Nicky and Mike? Had they been even more? 

Were Nicky and Mike?

Jealousy bubbled in his stomach at the thought, catching him off guard. 

Mike didn’t mind walking around in only a towel, but Nicky obviously did. He disappeared into the house a wolf and emerged about 15 minutes later fully dressed and his wet hair smelling like shampoo. 

In the same amount of time, Mike had found a pair of basketball shorts. 

“I’m always too hot after I run.” He admitted to Alex. “But Nicky’s shy.”

“Not shy.” Nicky mumbled. 

“Uh huh.” Mike raised his eyebrows. “Sure.” 

“Whatever.” Nicky shoved his hands in his pockets. “I’m hungry.” He poked Mike in the side deliberately. 

“That sucks.” Mike said, biting back a grin. 

Nicky sighed heavily. “Burgers?” He asked. 

Mike looked Nicky over. “Didn’t you just have dinner?”

The blond blushed but tried to ignore it. “Burgers?” He asked again. 

Mike laughed. “Yeah, sure. Ovi, burgers?” 

Alex nodded, smiling. “Yeah, ok.”

They went to McDonald’s and ordered a truly irresponsible number of cheeseburgers and Nicky demonstrated his unnatural talent for fitting the entire thing in his mouth in one bite. 

“That’s disgusting.” Mike said, wrinkling his nose even as he laughed. “Do it again.” 

Nicky flipped him off, cheeks bulging.

Alex wondered what else Nicky could fit in his mouth and then promptly tried to think of anything else. He realized Nicky was looking at him and he dropped his gaze, a bit embarrassed to be caught staring. 

The part that surprised Alex the most about wolves was how normal everything still was. He’d imagined it would’ve been disruptive to have natural predators on the team, sharing space with them, but most of the time he forgot about it. 

Mike and Nicky were wolves, along with the Nylander family. The goalie was, and another of the older guys. It just...it wasn’t unusual to see a wolf or two in the locker room or after practice. When the Nylander kids came to visit, there was always a pup running around. 

Mike and Nicky would play on the ice sometimes after practices and Alex and Sasha would stay to pass pucks to them. Sasha had no reservations about the wolves and he’d willingly let himself get drawn into their tussles and play fights, often ending up covered in hair and slobber. 

Apparently, there was no way being a wolf could spread, even if they did bite. 

“You didn’t know that?!” Mike asked, looking appalled. “Are there seriously no wolves in Russia?”

Mike was from Canada, one of the most wolf-friendly countries in the world. There’s no reason he should know. 

Nicky shifted uneasily; he at least knew the reputation in Russia, had heard rumors. 

“No wolves.” Sasha said quietly. 

“Why? It’s cold there, most wolves are in cold places.” Mike said. “Not even in Siberia?”

Nicky didn’t look up when he spoke. “They all died.” He said quietly. 

“Like...of a disease?” Though he didn’t sound optimistic. 

“Hunted.” Nicky answered. “It was legal until...until the ‘70s, I think.”

Mike looked a bit pale. “Holy shit, what?” 

“It’s still illegal to be a wolf.”

“Not illegal.” Alex said. “They don’t hunt now.”

Nicky looked a bit brittle at that comment. “It’s illegal to play hockey. Or change anywhere. Or- or get married to anyone not wolf.” His cheeks were tinted pink and he was staring down at his hands. 

Alex hadn’t thought about that. They weren’t hunted, but it was practically illegal to exist as a wolf. Not to mention he’d heard of wolf hunts occurring during his childhood, long after the hunts supposedly ended. 

Nicky seemed more on edge than usual for a few days; Mike assured them it was because of the approaching full moon. 

“We don’t have to change, but it kinda messes with you if you don’t. It gives me headaches and stuff if I don’t run at least a bit.” He explained. “Nicky gets grouchy.”

“Fuck off.” Nicky grumbled, hands shoved in his pockets and his hat pulled low. His whole face looked pinched and he looked personally offended by the fact that they were still at the airport. 

Mike raised his eyebrows at Alex, grinning. “See?”

By nightfall they were in Colorado and Mike and Nicky were brimming with energy. 

The hotel was one that had wolf amenities, which Alex hadn’t known was a thing. The hotel wasn’t downtown; the property backed up to a nature preserve, a place they could run. There was even a small locker room for them to change in and leave their stuff. 

Alex’s room was on the back of the hotel and he cracked his window when he got upstairs. Sasha Semin gave him a curious look, but said nothing. 

Alex fell asleep listening to wolves howling out somewhere in the distance. 

The wolves didn’t have to report to morning skate, but they were at breakfast. Mike and Nicky has already eaten by the time Alex got down, but they were still sitting in their chairs. They both looked exhausted but content. 

“Good night?” Alex asked. 

“Greenie ran into a tree.” Nicky said, delight flickering in his tired eyes. 

“Fuck you, I did not.” Mike protested. “It was a branch and it fell.” 

Nicky shook his head and Alex grinned, sitting down beside them with his plate. “Greenie most graceful.” 

“I hate both of you.” He mumbled, yawning. He did have a bruise on his cheek, one that hadn’t been there the day before. 

“You love.” Alex teased.

Nicky giggled quietly, his head propped up in his hand. His hair was a tangled mess and his eyes only half open. The hoodie he was wearing was too big for him and it took Alex a moment to see the 37 on the sleeve and realize it was Olie’s. 

Olie Kolzig was their goaltender and Alex knew him well enough to know he was tired of the younger guys and all the disruption they brought to his life. So, Nicky having his hoodie must be some sort of wolf thing. Alex didn’t ask. 

Nicky was the youngest player on the team and the youngest wolf. He had a boyish face and looked younger than he was. Teams were protective over their rookies, but it was especially easy to be protective over their quiet Swede. Easy enough that apparently even Olie managed it. 

Before the wolves went upstairs, Alex watched Olie come up to check on them, patting both of them on the back before leaving. 

In December, Alex’s family flew to D.C for Christmas and New Years. His mother and father stayed at his apartment, in his guest room. His grandparents and his brother stayed at a hotel. 

After the first game they attended, Alex was so excited to introduce them to his teammates that he forgot to mention anything about his grandfather to the wolves, or anything about the wolves to his grandfather. 

He didn’t remember until his grandfather shook Nicky’s hand and the blond yelped, pulling away. His grandmother chastised her husband and Tatiana frowned sternly at him. 

Mike pulled Nicky away before Alex could say anything. 

“Why did you do that?” He asked in undertones. 

“I just forgot to take my ring off.” He shook his head. “He’ll be fine, it’s not that bad. Wolves are very dramatic.”

Alex had watched Nicky block shots with only a grimace; he didn’t tend to be dramatic. 

“You can’t hurt my teammates.” He said. 

His grandfather slipped the ring into his pocket. “I’m sorry. Just an old habit.” He held his hands out. “Happy now?”

“He’d be happier if you didn’t hurt his friend.” His grandmother said quietly. “I knew you should’ve left that at home.”

“I like the ring. Sasha has my ring, this one was my brothers. It’s all family, that’s all.”

Alex sighed. “I’m going to go check on Nicky.”

“He’s fine.” His grandfather admonished. 

“I’ll be right back.”

Alex opened the door to the medical room slowly. Nicky was hunched over on the edge of the exam table, his face hidden against Mike as the doctor looked at his hand. 

Alex didn’t know what to say, but no one yelled at him to leave, so he stayed. 

Nicky’s curls were damp with sweat and what Alex could see of his face was red. Mike pursed his lips when he saw Alex. 

“You ok?” Alex asked softly. 

Nicky didn’t react. Mike squeezed his other hand. “Silver burns hurt really bad.” He explained. “And they’ll scar if they’re not treated right.”

“Burns, like from something hot? Or like…” he wasn’t sure of the words. 

“Like acid, almost.” 

“Technically, it’s an allergy.” The doctor said, muttering a quiet apology to Nicky as she massages a salve over his hand and he winced. “But it functions like a burn. It destroys the skin. Prolonged contact or a bigger burn leads to poisoning.”

Alex felt sick, guilty even though it wasn’t his fault. Alex has never been shy about the fact that his family had been hunters; in Moscow, they were fairly well known for that, especially among the older generations. Now, though...now he didn’t want Nicky to know, and he wasn’t sure why. Alex wasn’t a hunter; Alex would never hurt a wolf. 

The salve appeared to work quickly and Nicky’s muscles relaxed and he melted against Mike a little bit. 

Alex caught a glimpse of his hand, the burn a long streak about the span of the ring, like it had slid down his palm. 

The doctor bandaged it and Nicky held it close, protecting it from further pain. She then gave him a couple pills to take, with a cup of water. 

Mike waited until the doctor left, lowering his voice. “Did he know...nevermind.” He shook his head. 

“I didn’t know he had the ring on.” Alex said quickly. “I’m sorry.”

“S’not your fault.” Nicky mumbled. 

“Is he like...was he, you know…” Mike looked like he was trying to avoid saying the word. Nicky shook his head briefly and Mike trailed off. “I’ll go get your stuff.” He offered, leaving Nicky and Alex alone. 

Nicky looked at Alex like he was weighing his words, like he was trying to see through him to his motives. Finally, he cleared his throat. 

“Your grandfather hunted wolves?”

“Yeah.” Alex nodded, looking down. 

“Did you?” Nicky asked. 

“No!” Alex met his gaze, alarmed. “No, never.”

Nicky picked at the bandaging in his hand. “Did you want to?” He asked, almost too quiet to hear. 

Alex...Alex felt he owed him an honest answer. “When I was very small, I wanted to be like him. He was...he told so many stories and...and...I don’t know.”

“He’s your grandfather.”

“Exactly.” Alex nodded. “But...I don’t want to hurt anyone. I don’t think it’s good or...it’s not brave.”

Whatever pills the doctor had given Nicky were making him tired, or maybe just the physical game was. Either way, he stifled a yawn, his eyes heavy. He didn’t look fit for a heavy conversation. 

Instead of Mike, it was Nylander who came to give Nicky his bag. The older man carded a hand through his hair and pressed a kiss to his forehead, like he was checking for a fever. Nicky didn’t protest, which was out of character. 

“Go on, I'll drive you home.” He said, urging him up. 

Nicky stumbled a bit on his way out the door. Michael turned a stern look on Alex. “Don’t hurt him.” 

“I didn’t know.” Alex said. “I didn’t see-“

“Keep him the hell away from Nicklas. And Greenie. They’re too young, they don’t know enough to know to be careful.” He snapped. 

“I’m sorry.” Alex said, palms upturned. “I am. I can’t- I don’t know what you want.”

Michael sighed heavily. “Decide what side you're on.” He said, turning and leaving, letting the door shut heavily behind him. 

Nicky still had the bandage on at practice the next day. He was a bit ginger with his hand and Michael, Greenie, and even Olie kept checking in with him. 

It wasn’t Alex’s fault. It wasn’t Alex’s fault. He didn’t even know his grandfather had another ring. What was he supposed to do? Stop him? Tell an old man he couldn’t wear his deceased brother’s ring? Tell his grandfather- 

Alex couldn’t tell his grandfather anything, no one could; he was stubborn and set in his ways. 

And hell, the burn hadn’t been that big. Maybe the wolves were being dramatic about it. Sure, it hurt. It looked painful. But everyone kept checking on Nicklas like they expected him to be dying and it wasn’t a big burn. 

It wasn’t a big burn and yet it was Alex’s fault?

Christmas wasn’t how Alex remembered. He had his family with him, but he still felt homesick. For Moscow? For the innate comfort of home? For his naïveté and simpler times?

It didn’t matter. Alex was uprooted, unsettled, and his grandfather gave him a ceremonial silver knife, which did nothing to make him feel better. 

“Why?” He asked. 

His grandfather shrugged. “It’s tradition. My grandfather gave me my knife. I give you yours.” He patted his shoulder. “I know you won’t use it, but...it makes us worry less, knowing you have it.”

“You met my team. They’re good.”

“Not all wolves are on your team.” He said darkly. “Keep the knife sharp.”

That night, after everyone had gone to bed, Alex sat on the couch staring at the knife in his box. He was startled out of his reverie when his mother sat down beside him. “Your grandfather is from a different time.” She started. 

“I know-“

“And he’s too stubborn to grow.” She finished. “You’re not.”

“What do I do with this?” He gestured at it. 

Tatiana shook her head. “The knife? I don’t know. You can keep it, put it away somewhere very safe. You could get rid of it.”

“Can I?”

“You’re a man, Alexander.” She said, brushing her fingers through his hair. “You know what you need and don’t need.” 

He lowered his head and she kissed his forehead. He sighed and leaned against her side, like when he was a little boy and something troubled him. 

Werewolves weren’t hunted in the United States, and they weren’t restricted, but certain groups viewed them poorly. Alex hadn’t known, until they’d traveled the country. In most places, there were lots of wolves, with hotels with wolf amenities and safe cutlery. 

At home, when Nicky scored or Olie made a great save, the howls from the stands were supportive. Sometimes, on the road, they were derisive. 

Some players called the wolves mutts or dogs. Someone brought a dog whistle to a game in Dallas, and Alex learned that the wolves really did have a heightened sense of hearing. Nicky had to cover his ears on the bench, until security managed to confiscate the whistle. 

In Saint Louis, someone threw silver spoons onto the ice and got arrested. Saint Louis even had wolves on the team; Alex couldn’t imagine how they felt. 

“You know,” Nicky said. “My parents told me to wait a year. They thought...thought I wouldn’t be safe in the NHL.”

This, they had in common. “My grandmother didn’t want me to go, either. Thought it was too dangerous.” 

Nicky gave him a lopsided grin, pressing closer to him in their seat on the bus. “Feel safe?” He asked. 

“Me, yeah. Shoes...no.” It wasn’t a joke; Greenie had destroyed his pair of fluorescent shoes two days before. He was still finding bits of neon rubber in his apartment. 

Nicky laughed. 

“Do you...you feel safe?”

Nicky looked thoughtful. “Yeah. Not so safe as Sweden, but...with the team, yeah.”

Alex smiled. “Good.”

It was dark. Alex was tired. Nicky’s face was close and Alex could kiss him. He wouldn’t, but...the thought was there. The idea of what Nicky’s lips would feel like, the desire, it was there. 

Nicky leaned his head against Alex’s shoulder, closing his eyes. They were only a few miles from the hotel, thank god, but they were stuck in traffic. Alex leaned his cheek against Nicky’s head, letting himself relax for a moment. 

The popular stereotype was of a lone wolf, someone that went off on their own, but Alex didn’t know where that came from. 

Certainly not werewolves. They were rarely alone, rarely apart. Nicky and Mike were inseparable. The older wolves always checking in on them. The older Nylander kids would Skype Nicky sometimes, on the road, just to see him.

Alex had Sasha, had the bond created by being displaced countrymen, the bond of learning English and American culture. It wasn’t the same. 

For one, there was only one of Sasha. Usually, Alex was exceedingly grateful for that; he could only tolerate the one. Sometimes, though, he longed for a tight knit group that cared for him so deeply. 

They lost badly the next day in Chicago. They lost badly enough that Alex expected a bagskate the next day, and maybe the one after that. A bad enough loss that no one dared go out afterwards. They drank away their sorrows at the hotel bar instead. 

Practice was brutal. Alex wasn’t sure what the goal was, or if the goal was suffering. A couple guys puked and that did nothing as far as earning them sympathy. 

Afterwards, Alex felt useless. He sat on the bench, a hand on Sasha’s back as he panted and tried to keep himself together. 

“Fuck.” Mike said. He looked a little green, a Gatorade bottle clutched in his hand. “Fuck, that sucked.” 

“No shit.” Sasha groaned, covering his face. 

Nicky looked up, a sly shit-eating grin on his face. “I feel fine.” He said, shrugging, despite his tomato red face. 

Alex leaned back, laughing until his sides hurt, and Mike grabbed the blond and tickled him until he gave in. 

Nicky was ticklish; Alex didn’t know what to do with that information. 

Maybe the bagskate worked. They won the next game two nights later against Minnesota. Nicky had 4 assists and Mike insisted they go out. 

Nicky grumbled about it because he couldn’t drink, until Mike promised him he’d buy him shots. 

Nicky got soda, Mike bought a platter of shots, and Sasha dumped a few into Nicky’s drink, sipping it to taste it. “There. Good.”

Nicky sipped it and coughed. “That’s a lot.” He said, wiping his mouth. 

Sasha rolled his eyes. “You want drunk or not?” He asked. 

Nicky tipped his head, conceding to Sasha’s wisdom, and took another drink. 

Alex felt good. He felt like dancing. He might, later. Maybe he could find a girl to dance with; maybe he could get Nicky to dance with him. 

Nicky was quiet, but not when he was drunk. He wasn’t shy, not now that Alex had gotten to know him. Nicky was a bit more pliable when he’d been drinking, and it took almost nothing to coax him onto the dance floor. 

Alex didn’t care that Nicky spent more time laughing at his antics than actually dancing. The feel of Nicky’s soft hand on his side, hot through his t-shirt, lingered long after they piled into the taxi. The mental image of Nicky dropping off to sleep in the backseat against Mike’s shoulder was behind his eyelids when he finally fell asleep. 

Alex’s lingering suspicion that Mike and Nicky were together was dispelled when Mike finally introduced them to Courtney. She was brunette, like Mike, and a wolf too. Mike was head over heels gone on her. 

“Wolves always date wolves?” Alex asked, after a while. He had his feet propped up near the fire pit and Sasha Semin was half-asleep against him and his body felt heavy and warm in the best of ways. 

“Not always.” Mike said, sparing a half-second glance at Nicky. “It’s nice to have someone who understands though. Someone I can run with.”

“Greenie wants pups.” Nicky teased fondly, his toes tucked in under Mike’s thigh. He hadn’t spoken for an hour since they started smoking. 

Mike swatted at him. “Shut up, brat.”

Nicky giggled. If Nicky got loud when he was drunk, then being high made him quieter. He stared at the fire intently, for the most part. When he did talk, he was soft spoken and honey sweet. 

Mike tickled him and wound up with Nicky curled against him, half laying in his lap. 

The wolves were more touchy than most people, Alex had come to realize. It was nothing for them to touch or hug, or even press a kiss to the cheek or forehead of a tired wolf. It was a pack thing, a family thing. 

It settled Nicky and Mike, when nothing else could. 

“You want pups, Nicky?” Alex asked, teasingly. 

Nicky shrugged, hiding his face against Mike’s leg, so Alex could only see one green eye glinting in the firelight. He covered that too when he realized Alex was looking at him. 

Mike combed his fingers through his hair, soothing him. Nicky mumbled something but it was too quiet, too obscured by his hands, to be heard. 

“Hey.” Mike interrupted. “You don’t have to answer.” He looked suddenly protective, his eyes a bit more sharp. 

“S’okay.”

“Nick, c’mon. Maybe you should go to bed.” Mike said. 

Nicky whined and shook his head. “Mikey, nooo…” 

Alex smiled helplessly and Mike did too. “Ok, fine. Just don’t...just be careful.”

Alex wondered what Nicky had said that Mike didn’t let him repeat; what Nicky said that Mike was protecting him from telling others. 

They smoked a bit more, until Nicky was basically asleep in Mike’s lap and Sasha was actually asleep against Alex. 

“Lightweights.” Alex said, grinning when Mike laughed. 

“No kidding.” He was still playing with Nicky’s hair. “You guys should stay tonight. Guest room is clean. I have...there’s the couch, too. If you want.”

Alex had shared a bed with Sasha and he probably would again. “Bed’s fine.” He assured him. 

Sasha wasn’t snuggly. Alex imagined that Nicky was. 

When Alex was a kid, there had been a murder. Not that rare, in Moscow, but it had been different. A woman had been violently murdered and torn apart. The press had blamed a wolf. It probably wasn’t; even then, dissenting voices said it was most likely her husband. 

But the public ran with the idea that it was a wolf. A wolf had mangled and killed her. They sought out wolves, no matter how distant, to kill in retribution. 

None of the murders were ever solved. 

Surely, some wolves were capable of murder, just like some people. Alex had always assumed a temper, a violent streak, was closer to the surface for wolves. But when Nicky got upended on the ice, it was Alex that saw red, not any of the wolves. 

Sasha yanked him back, while Alex was screaming Russian profanities at the whole fucking bench. He’d fuck up all of them, if he had to. No one hurt his teammates, especially Nicky. 

“Get it together.” Sasha growled at him, pushing him back towards Nicky. 

Nicky. 

Nicky was curled on the ice, his knees under him. The arena was quiet and Alex rushed to his side as he started to get up. 

“Nicky, you ok?”

“Uh huh.” Nicky nodded. 

“You sure?”

“Yeah.” Nicky said, a little weakly, but sounding mostly like himself. He pushed himself up a bit. He looked dazed, but ok. “I’m fine.”

The crowd applauded when Nicky got to his skates. They showed the hit on the Jumbotron and Alex winced watching it. Nicky was ok, maybe because he was young, maybe because he was lucky. 

Nicky didn’t even miss a shift, Alex noted with pride. 

After the game, he found Nicky and Mike together. Mike made an excuse to leave and Nicky didn’t look surprised. 

“Hi.” Alex said, belatedly realizing he wasn’t really sure what he was doing. 

“Hi.” Nicky repeated. 

“You ok?”

Nicky wrinkled his nose. “A little sore.” He admitted.

“Sorry. Sucks.”

“Were you...you got...you almost took a penalty.” Nicky landed on, turning pink. 

“Made me mad.”

“Because of the hit?” Nicky asked. 

“Because hit you.” Alex admitted. 

Nicky’s blush deepened and he looked almost pleased for a moment. “Oh.” He smiled at him. “I’m ok.”

Alex stepped closer, reaching up a hand to touch his hair, and Nicky leaned in towards his touch. Alex imagined he could push the curls back and kiss his forehead, but-

“Nicklas, let’s go home.” Nylander said, interrupting. He gave Alex a skeptical look as Nicky collected his bag. 

Alex wasn’t sure what he would’ve done had Michael not come in. He might’ve kissed him. For the first time, though, he thought Nicky would’ve liked it. 

They played a rare game on the night of the full moon, and the nervous energy of the wolves was contagious. They couldn’t help it, Alex knew, but the whole locker room felt like everyone was holding their collective breath. 

Olie snapped at Mike and Nicky when their fidgeting got to the point of driving him crazy; goalies maybe existed closer to that edge than anyone else on the team. Ordinarily, Greenie at least would’ve protested being put in his place, but he didn’t. 

Mike was taping his stick again, for the third time; he couldn’t seem to get it right. Nicky was on the floor beside him, deliberately and intentionally still. He was staring into space, biting his lower lip. 

“You ok?” Sasha asked, gently nudging Nicky with his foot. 

Nicky startled, something in his eyes a touch wild and feral.

“You gonna be ok to play?” Alex asked. 

Nicky blinked at him and then nodded. “Yeah.”

“You sure? Not gonna...not gonna change?”

Nicky’s eyes went dark and flat and Mike’s head snapped up, his inattention wrinkling the tape on his blade. “I’m fine.” He said acerbically. 

“I just...you look…” he looked half-wild, for a moment. Just for an instant, Alex could really see the wolf in him. “You look like you’re gonna.” He said quietly. 

“Fuck off, Ovi.” Mike interjected. “What do you know?”

Alex held up his hands. “Sorry.” He didn’t know, obviously. He’d stepped in something he hadn’t intended. 

Mike studied him for a moment, tension slowly draining from his shoulders. “When you…we don’t just change because of the moon. We can control ourselves.” 

Nicky had his hand clenched, staring down at his knees. 

“Sorry.” Alex repeated. “I didn’t know.”

His grandfather had told him wolves would change at the full moon. He told him they could be forced to change if they smelled fresh blood. Or sometimes, he’d said, sometimes they’d just lose control of themselves and go on a rampage. 

Obviously, Alex had known the last part wasn’t really true. He hadn’t...he hadn’t realized how untrue the rest of it was too. 

“We’re not the monsters.” Nicky said sharply, all his features gone cold and hard. 

“I know.” Alex said, a bit too quietly. 

Nicky looked like he was burning up. He got up all at once stalked off to the bathroom, maybe just to get away from them. From Alex. 

Mike was redoing his tape for the fourth time, tongue poking out. “Don’t mind him. He’s just pissy.” 

“What’s it feel like?” Alex asked. 

Mike looked up. “It’s like...you just...I need it, I don’t know. And...my skin feels like it doesn’t fit right.” Alex nodded. “It’s- it’s hard to explain. Just...my muscles all just want to change and run but I can’t and it’s frustrating.” 

“But you don’t change without…”

“Only really young, really inexperienced wolves would change involuntarily. It’s like...it’s like wetting the bed” Mike nodded. He looked at the tape, spotting a wrinkle. “Fuck.”

“Here, here, me.” Sasha said, taking it from his hands. He sat beside him and peeled the tape back, smoothing out the wrinkles and then finishing the job. 

“Should I go say sorry to Nicky?” 

Mike shook his head. “He just feels like shit. Don’t take it personally.” 

They were playing the Rangers, who had their fair share of wolves on their team too. The game had a rough, gritty feeling from the start and it didn’t take long for that to spread to everyone. 

Alex was going to be a mess of bruises the next day, that was for sure. 

The wolves were quick to shower after the game. Nicky stopped long enough to look at Alex, his ears going pink when Alex met his gaze. “Going home?” Nicky asked. 

“Yeah. Tired.”

Nicky nodded slowly. “You could...you could come over.”

Alex was about to nod when Michael clamped a hand down on Nicky’s shoulder, pushing him forward. “I’m sure Ovi wants to rest and not stay up listening to everyone howl.” He said dryly. 

Nicky glanced over his shoulder at Alex before hanging him head. 

Alex wasn’t sure if he should’ve said yes. Yes and do what? Hang out with a bunch of wolves? Stay up all night? He was exhausted. He yearned for his bed. 

He would’ve still gone, though. 

He would’ve still gone, and he wanted Nicky to know that. 

‘Have a good run.’ He texted Mike and Nicky before bed, somewhere between a joke and an apology. 

In the morning, he had a text from Mike. It was a picture of Nicky in his wolf form, sprawled out on the deck at the Nylander house with a couple of the pups snuggled up against him. He was sleeping, his head resting on the biggest pup. The sky was bluish orangish behind him, barely lighting them adequately. 

Alex didn’t know quite what to do with the rush of affection that welled in his stomach. 

He was still staring at the picture when Nicky texted their group chat. ‘Fuck you,’ and then ‘Pizza?’

Wolves were ravenous, Alex discovered, but mostly for pizza and burgers. 

Mike and Nicky each ate their own large pizza, with Nicky taking Greenie’s crusts when he said he wasn’t going to eat them. 

Sasha nudged Nicky. “Nyles don’t feed you?” He teased. 

Nicky went red. “We ran all night.” He protested.

“He’s a growing pup.” Mike teased, preemptively bracing himself for when Nicky punched him. “He needs lots of food.”

“Hate all of you.” Nicky muttered, crossing his arms. 

“I’m only good.” Alex protested. 

Nicky cocked his head to look at him. Alex felt like, for a moment, everything else fell away and he and Nicky were the only ones there. Maybe the only ones in the world. 

“Uh huh.” Nicky said skeptically. “Sure.” For a second, Alex was worried Nicky was still mad from the night before, but then the blond favored him with a wry smile and that melted away. 

They won in Atlanta two nights later and Alex insisted they go out. He expected Nicky to protest, but he agreed easily. Mike looked skeptical. “I’m beat. Can’t we just stay in?”

Nicky rocked up on his toes. “You can stay.” He shrugged. 

Mike narrowed his eyes and frowned at Nicky. “Aren’t you tired? C’mon, you’re always tired.”

“Not tired.” He said quickly. He looked at Alex. “Greenie needs his beauty sleep.” He looked pleased with his chirp, grinning. 

Mike rolled his eyes. “Yeah, imagine what you’d look like if you didn’t sleep all the time.” He pushed himself up. “Fine, let’s go.”

“You can stay.” Nicky said. 

“Nope, let’s go.” Mike said. “I need a drink.”

At the bar, Nicky stole a couple cigarettes from Sasha and shot Alex a look over his shoulder. Alex followed him outside. 

It was Atlanta, so it wasn’t really cold. Nicky leaned against the side of the building, tucked into the shadows of the alley. 

Alex’s grandmother would probably have a heart attack if she knew he followed a werewolf into a dark alley; then again, Nicky’s grandmother would probably think the same. 

Nicky had a lighter in his pocket and he passed it and one cigarette to Alex. 

“Thanks.”

“Sure.”

“You smoke?” Alex asked curiously. 

“Not really.” Nicky admitted, stifling a cough and then giggling. “Just thought...it’s nice outside.”

Alex smoked in Russia, sometimes, if he’d been drinking. Atlanta, in the transition from Winter to Spring, in an alley with Nicklas Backstrom; that worked too. 

“I’ve never been to Russia.” Nicky said, an apparent non sequitur. 

“I’m never been Sweden.” Alex offered. 

Nicky smiled, looking down. “You could come with me. This summer, I mean.” He looked up at Alex through his lashes. 

“Sounds nice.” 

Nicky nodded. “I wasn’t...allowed. To go to Russia.” He started slowly. “Wasn’t...wasn’t supposed to talk to Russians.”

Alex wasn’t sure where this was going. “Oh?”

“Yeah.” Nicky nodded. He finally looked up at Alex again. “In Sweden-...you know how they tell stories to little kids? To make you scared?”

“Yeah. Like...keep you from playing in the woods.” There weren’t a lot of woods in Moscow, but...Alex knew what he meant. Stories to get you home before dark, stories to keep you close to home, stories to keep you from swimming in the river. 

“Exactly.” Nicky was fidgeting with the ends of his sleeve. “In Sweden, for wolves...all those stories were about hunters.”

“From Russia?” Alex guessed. 

“Yeah.” Nicky licked his lips. “My family, everyone, they told me...they said to stay away. From Russians.”

“From me?” Alex whispered, feeling the quiet words like a shot to the gut. 

“Uh huh.” Nicky straightened up a bit. This close, he was only a bit shorter than Alex, only a bit less broad. “Should I?”

Alex shook his head. “No, I- I’m not...I know I don’t know about wolves but...I don’t want to hurt you. I want to know more. So I don’t...so I don’t say stupid things.” He shifted closer, only inches between them. “I’m not like my grandfather.”

“I know.” Nicky assured him. “Don’t want to stay away.”

Alex lifted his hand to cup Nicky’s cheek, his heart melting when he leaned into the touch. “Good.” Alex pressed his forehead against Nicky’s. 

There was a loud laughing scream outside the club that surprised the both of them. Nicky gave a startled laugh, looking up. “We should…”

“Yeah.” A thought occurred to Alex. “Does Greenie-“

Nicky was already blushing. “Greenie knows. He isn’t...he likes you he just...he isn’t sure…”

“He protects you.”

“Yeah. But I don’t need it.” Nicky reminded him. 

Alex chuckled. “I know.”

They didn’t have a chance to really be alone again the rest of the roadie, until the last night. 

Mike sat down next to Alex at the end of dinner, slipping his room key into his pocket. “I’ll trade you.” He said quietly, looking over his shoulder surreptitiously. 

“What?” Alex looked down, confused, pulling the key card out. “Oh.”

“Gimme your key.” Mike prodded. “Sasha’s gotta be a better roommate anyway.”

Alex looked up and glanced at Sasha, who was doing his best to put tiny braids in Nicky’s hair while the blond giggled at some story Brooks was telling. “Probably still annoying.”

“Well, at least he’ll be annoying and not talking about you.” Mike decided. 

Alex felt his cheeks go pink, pleased. “Yeah?”

Mike lowered his voice. “I know you’re safe, I just...Nyles thinks it’s reckless. That Nicky likes you. He kinda just thinks Nick should settle down with a wolf.”

“A girl?”. 

“That would be even better.” Mike rolled his eyes. “But I don’t think he’s interested in that.” 

“No shit.” Alex said dryly. 

Mike laughed. “Yeah. So. Have fun, or whatever.” He pushed Alex up. 

“Does Nicky know?”

Mike gave a wicked grin. “Nope. Thought you’d want to tell him.”

Alex could tell him, or he could just surprise him. He went upstairs and sat on the edge of the bed, waiting. 

It only took about 10 minutes for the lock to click and the door to open. “Oh.” Nicky paused, hand on the doorknob. “Hi.”

“Greenie said he needed new roomie, tired of you.” Alex teased. 

Nicky laughed. “Oh, ok.” He kicked his shoes off and sat on the opposite bed, staring at Alex. 

“You want to watch a movie?” Alex offered. 

Nicky nodded. He settled in beside Alex, relaxing all the way when Alex lifted his arm and put it around him. Nicky gave a sigh of contentment. 

Alex had no idea what was playing on the TV. All he could focus on was the hot press of Nicky up against his side. 

Nicky found Alex’s hand and intertwined their fingers. “Would you really come to Sweden?” He asked, looking down at their hands. 

“Yeah.” Alex answered. “Would that be ok?” There was a very real chance Nicky’s family wouldn’t approve of him; Russian, descended from hunters...he was what Nicky had been warned about as a child. 

Nicky pursed his lips. “It would be ok.” He said. He looked up at Alex. 

“Good.”

“You’re not...you’re good. You’re not a hunter.”

“Don’t want to hurt anyone.” Alex promised. 

Nicky’s eyes sparkled. “What about Pittsburgh?”

Alex grinned. “Maybe just a little.” He teased. He cleared his throat. “I don’t know...anything about wolves. You tell me so I don’t say stupid things?”

Nicky nodded, a wry smile playing at the corners of his lips. “You’ve already said most of the stupid things, I think.” He teased. 

Alex laughed and tickled him, because Nicky was ticklish and Alex wanted- Alex just wanted an excuse to touch him more. 

Nicky laughed and tried to get away, but he might’ve let Alex hold him down anyway. 

Alex had Nicky’s wrists pinned above his head, his weight holding him down. Nicky was looking up at him with wide, wanting eyes. 

He kissed him. 

Nicky kissed back, struggling against Alex’s hold on him and then biting at his lip when he couldn’t break free. 

Finally, Alex let go of his hands, tangling one in Nicky’s hair and holding him close. Nicky wrapped his arms around him, clinging to him. 

Eventually, they broke for air. Nicky pressed his nose against Alex’s cheek. “We shouldn’t…”

“Yeah.” Alex felt Nicky swallow. “Have you…?” He wondered. 

Nicky was already blushing, but it deepened. “Yeah. Have...have you?” 

“Yeah, but only with girls.”

“Oh.” Nicky nodded. 

Alex rolled onto his side, still looking at him. “That ok?”

“Yeah. I-I’ve never, not with...only with guys.” He admitted. 

“Ah.” Alex thought about it. “Probably good. Someone needs to know what they’re doing.” 

Nicky giggled and burrowed closer to Alex, tucked in against his chest. Alex had a few strands of blond hair in his mouth; he didn’t mind. 

Nicky tilted his head up to look at Alex again, his gaze lingering over his lips. Alex kissed him again. 

Alex lost track of time for a bit, lost in the sweet slide of Nicky’s lips over his, the taste of him on his tongue. 

“Do you...are we…?” He trailed off, looking uncertain. 

“We together?” Alex guessed. “Like...like dating.”

“Yeah.” Nicky relaxed a bit. “I’d like that.” He tried to talk quietly and it made his voice a touch rough. 

“Me too.” Alex assured him. Nicky looked down again. Alex had known Nicky since the beginning of the season, had been paying attention to him that long; he recognized what it looked like when he was puzzling out how to say something. “What?” He prodded gently. 

“Can I change?” Nicky asked, looking up. 

Alex didn’t know if that was more comfortable for Nicky, or if...if it was a measure of something; if Alex was comfortable with it, with all of him, with every aspect of Nicky. 

“Yeah.” Alex nodded. 

Nicky’s smile brightened. “Thanks.”

He retreated to the bathroom to change and emerged only a few moments later, in his wolf form. He curled up on the bed beside Alex. 

It was unexpectedly comfortable. Nicky was warm and broad, sturdy alongside Alex. He tentatively pet him and Nicky relaxed under his touch. He pet his ears and Nicky leaned into the touch. His ears were velvety soft and Alex...Alex wasn’t apprehensive anymore. 

They fell asleep like that. 

In the morning, Nicky was still a wolf. He whined when Alex shook him awake, having ignored the alarm going off. 

“Go change, gotta go to breakfast.” Alex said, poking him when his eyes closed. 

Nicky opened his eyes in thin slits and gave him a stern look. Alex pushed him again and the wolf finally disappeared into the bathroom to change. 

Nicky emerged in the clothes he’d left on the floor the night before. 

“You awake?” Alex teased. 

Nicky gave him a gentle smile and rubbed his eyes. “Uh huh.” His voice was husky from disuse and he looked like he could fall back to sleep. 

If they didn’t have a plane to catch Alex could spend all day snuggling him but, regretfully, they did. 

They arrived at breakfast no later than usual, getting in the buffet line behind Mike and Sasha, who were bickering about who’d taken too long of a shower. 

Mike bumped Nicky’s arm. “Good night?” He asked, raising his eyebrows suggestively. 

Nicky looked down, scarlet cheeked. “Shut up.” He muttered. He was still smiling a bit, though, so Mike didn’t look too worried. Mike winked at Alex and Alex made a show of rolling his eyes at him. 

Nicky fell asleep against Alex’s shoulder on the plane, their hands tangled together. Nylander gave Alex an appraising look, but didn’t move to say anything. 

There was nothing he could really do; Nicky chose Alex. 

Michael found Alex at the arena, sidling up alongside him as they filed off the bus. “I know Nicky can handle himself.” He started quietly. “Just...make sure you’re really ready to be part of his pack. Otherwise it’ll hurt him a whole lot.”

It wasn’t what Alex had expected. It was gentler, for one thing. 

The surprise must’ve shown in Alex’s face. Michael chuckled. “I’m not an idiot. I know you care about him.” 

Michael may have had more to say, but Nicky slipped in between them, looping an arm through Alex’s and giving Michael a not-insignificant amount of side eye. 

“Do you want dinner?” Nicky asked, ignoring his mentor for the moment. 

“Yeah.”

“Good.” Nicky smiled at him. “I’m hungry.”

“Shocking.” Michael chirped, ruffling Nicky’s hair. Nicky tried to give him a stern look, but somewhere between the tangled curls and chubby cheeks, it didn’t really work. 

They got burgers and fries. They got shakes. Nicky kicked his feet into Alex’s under the table and the realization of exactly how much like a date this was suddenly registered. 

“Go walk, after this?” Alex offered. 

Nicky nodded. 

They walked along the riverfront and talked, covering all sorts of information that they had somehow missed over the rest of the season, filling in the gaps between friendship and relationship. 

Alex told him about his brother, about what growing up in Moscow was like. He told him, quietly, some of the stories he’d been told as a child. 

Nicky told him about his family, about the big family reunion they did in the summer. He told him about a kid at school burning him with silverware, just to see if it really worked. He told Alex about the stories he’d heard as a child. 

“Even in Sweden, they hurt you?” Alex asked, heartbroken at the thought. 

Nicky shrugged. “There’s still...there’s lots of wolves, but there’s more people. And people don’t like things that are different.”

“True.”

“Mostly, it was good. There was another wolf on my team, when I was a kid. So, we were friends.” Nicky looked unphased by it. “I had my family.”

“You miss home?”

“Yeah.” Nicky looked down. “But...the Nylanders are good to me. I like them.” 

“You like playing with pups?” Alex teased. 

Nicky went delightfully pink. “Yeah. They’re lots of fun.” 

Alex took Nicky back to the Nylander home. The pups were asleep in a pile downstairs, all snuggled in together. 

Alex has started the season nervous about wolves and now he wanted to cuddle up with them. Nicky favored them with a distracted fond smile. “They’re sweet.” He murmured. “I mean, when they’re sleeping.”

Alex chuckled. “Very cute.” He agreed. 

The next full moon, Alex was again invited to the Nylander house for the night. This time, he accepted the offer. 

Michael looked surprised when he arrived at the front door. “You sure?” He asked, in lieu of a proper greeting. 

Alex nodded. “Yeah.” He said. “Nicky ask, so I’m here.”

“Usually, we stay wolves all night.” Michael told him, still standing in the doorway. 

“I know, Nicky told me.” Alex said. “He wants me here, I’m here.” He shrugged his shoulders. 

Michael gave him an appraising look before stepping aside and letting him in. 

He stayed up for a while, playing with the pups in the yard, and then Nicky tugged gently on his sleeve, pulling him back towards the house. They did have a game the next day and Nicky had worried about Alex getting enough sleep. 

“Ok, ok. Bedtime, I know.” He assured him. He rubbed Nicky’s ears. “Have a good night.” 

Nicky licked his face, looking pleased with himself, just like after he said something particularly clever. Alex laughed, heading back inside. 

He fell asleep on the couch, listening to the howls through the window, feeling warm and deeply content as he snuggled into a fleece blanket. 

He woke up to something much different. 

People crying, shouting, speaking rapid-fire Swedish, and the lights all turning on at once. He tangled himself in his blanket as he tried to get up, blinking all the chaos into focus. 

Nicky was being supported between Mike and Nyles, his face hidden against Mike’s shoulder. All the wolves were only half-dressed, muddy and soaking wet. The back door was wide open and the cold air rushed in to the living room. 

“Here, here, Nicky, sit down.” Alex helped him to the couch. Nicky was shivering violently and Alex wrapped the blanket around him. A painful, half-feral sounding sob escaped him. 

As his eyes adjusted to the light, Alex could see a burn encircling his forearm from his wrist to elbow. “What happened?” He asked. 

Nicky covered his mouth with his other hand, trying to keep himself together. “Hurts. Nyles, please, hurts.” He keened. 

“Hold on.” Michael returned from the bathroom and upended a first aid kit on the coffee table, hastily digging through the mess of bandages that fell out. “William, get an ice pack or something.” 

William produced an ice pack from the kitchen at the same time Michael made a triumphant sound, snatching a package from the mess. 

“Here, I’ve got it.” Michael said. “It’s ok, Nicky, it’s ok.” Nicky’s body was quaking as he bit the meat of his palm to silence himself. 

Michael tore the packaging open with his teeth and pulled out a bandage saturated in some kind of thick liquid. Nicky hid his face against Alex’s chest as he wrapped it around the burn, making a noise that twisted Alex’s stomach. 

“What happened?” Alex asked again. The Nylander kids were all tearful or actually crying. Michael looked laser focused, like he did on the ice. Mike looked like he was going to explode. 

“Some fucking-“

“Language.” Nyles said, covering the dressing with dry gauze to hold it in place. 

“There was a f- a freaking silver snare!” Greenie said, gritting his teeth. 

Alex wasn’t sure what a snare was, but he knew silver was bad. “Why?” 

“The hell should I know!” Mike snapped. 

“It was...at the property line.” Nicky said, dropping his hand to squeeze Alex’s tightly. He’d gone pale, clammy under Alex’s hand. 

“Some asshole-“

“Language.” Michael interrupted again. 

Greenie made a frustrated sound, pacing off and raking his fingers through his hair. 

“I’ll go take a look once the sun comes up.” Michael said. “It might not be new.”

“Then how-“ Mike started.

“We don’t go that far. The kids didn’t used to go into the woods.” Michael said. “Our neighbors now are very accepting, but they’ve only lived there about five years.” 

Unspoken, was the fact that the old neighbors hadn’t been good. Alex felt sick at the idea of the property being lined with traps. 

Mike was still pacing behind the couch, his muscles tight and his gait predatory. The gleam in his eye wasn’t quite human. The children were distraught, the youngest had changed again, so that a pup was sitting on the floor watching everything with mournful eyes. 

“Make him sit down.” Nicky said, barely audible. 

“What did he say?” Mike asked, his eyes wild with worry. 

“Said sit down.” Alex repeated. 

Mike frowned, but sat down on Nicky’s other side. “You ok?” He asked softly. 

“Hurts.” Nicky said, swallowing thickly, trying to control his voice. 

“I’ve got some medicine for you.” Michael said, tapping his knee. “Can you take it?”

Nicky shook his head. “Nuh uh. I’m gonna…” he covered his mouth. 

Michael handed him the bathroom trash can and Nicky gagged, bringing up nothing but bile. 

“Is he ok?” Alex asked.

“Silver burns make you sick.” Michael said quietly. “Here, get him to take these.” He handed the pills to Alex and started repacking the first aid kit. 

“What are they?” Alex asked. 

“Tylenol and benadryl.” Michael said. “Silver is kind of like an allergic response. Benadryl helps.”

Alex nodded slowly. “Helps?”

“Not a whole lot.” Mike said. “Mostly to try to keep it from getting worse.”

After a few more minutes, Nicky took the proffered pills and slumped back against Alex, covering his face and trying to meter him breathing. Mike was rubbing his arm, whispering something in his ear. 

“I go with you, look for silver thing.” Alex decided. 

“You don’t need to-“

“You can’t touch, so I go.” Alex couldn’t do a lot to protect Nicky, but he could do this. “Pack now, right?”

Michael’s whole face went soft as he smiled. “Yeah. That would be good.”

There were still a few hours until dawn, so Alex and Mike helped Nicky downstairs, letting the blond curl up in bed between them and try to fall asleep. It took a while, until the Benadryl really kicked in and pulled him under. Even so, he whimpered occasionally, shifting uncomfortably. 

The word dramatic came back to Alex in a rush of hot anger. 

Dramatic. 

Nicky wasn’t ever dramatic, certainly not now. The burn had looked brutal and horrible and gut-churningly painful. And the way Mike was being gentle with him, wasn’t teasing him, was even more telling. Mike lived to aggravate Nicky but even he wouldn’t dare try it now. 

Alex didn’t truly fall asleep, but he dozed for a while. Periodically, Nicky would make a sound, pained or at least uncomfortable. He’d calm again when Mike and Alex touched him, rubbing his back or playing with his hair. 

As the sky shifted towards daylight, Alex went upstairs. Michael was lacing up his shoes, looking tired. 

They didn’t talk much. They had to drive 4 wheelers out to the edge of the property and the sound of the motors drowned out everything else. 

The snare was an animal trap, Alex learned. It was a rope set up to catch a leg. The rope was almost hidden under vines and foliage. Alex felt sick imagining Nicky get caught in it, imagining how scared he must’ve been. 

The rope had silver strands running through it, glinting in the sunrise. He untangled it and stashed it in the trash bags Michael had brought. 

“Is Nicky gonna be ok?”

“He might be sick for a bit, but he’ll be ok.” Michael assured him. 

Alex nodded. “How does...how does the silver hurt?” He asked as they walked, searching for any other traps.

“You saw the burns?” Michael asked; Alex nodded. They were angry and red and blistered already. “So, a lot of hunters use silver bullets. It’s like that, but inside. And the bullets usually stay in, and you get silver poisoning.” 

“Oh.”

“It’s really painful.” Michael nodded. “Wolves would either bleed to death or get so sick they die.” 

Alex nodded, feeling his eyes go wet. He wiped them dry on his sleeve. “I’m sorry.” He whispered. 

Michael shook his head. “It’s not your fault.”

“My family-“

“You don’t.” Michael said. “You chose to be different.” 

They found another silver rope. The snare had broken, but the rope remained intact, like a deadly snake lurking in the underbrush. 

By the time the sun was all the way up, they returned home, double bagging the ropes and putting them on a shelf in the garage, out of reach of inquisitive children. 

Alex washed up and went back downstairs to check on Nicky. 

Mike was sitting up on the edge of the bed, absently playing with Nicky’s hair. The blond was flushed and sleeping restlessly.

“He’s getting a fever.” Mike said, looking up. 

“Is that bad?” Alex asked, sitting beside them. 

“It’s normal.” Mike smoothed his hair back off his forehead. “Just sucks.” 

Nicky whined quietly, cracking his eyes open. 

“Hi, Nicky.” Alex smiled at him sadly. 

“Hi.” He whispered. 

“Go back to sleep.” Alex kissed his forehead. 

“Stay?”

Alex’s heart hurt when he had to say no. “Gotta go to morning skate.” Nicky whined. “But I come back after, ok?” He promised. 

“I’ll stay.” Mike offered; the wolves had a standing agreement to be excluded from morning practices after a full moon. 

When Alex came back, Mike and Nicky were snuggled up in bed, sleeping. Alex crawled in beside them and fell asleep too. 

When he woke up, Nicky was tucked in under his arm, so warm he was making Alex uncomfortable. Alex shifted slightly and Nicky’s nose wrinkled as his whole face scrunched up. Alex kissed his forehead to soothe him. 

“Jesus fuck, it’s hot.” Greenie groaned, blinking awake. 

“Fever.” Alex said, pulling the blankets down off Nicky. 

Mike propped himself up on his elbow, surveying them. “I’ll get more meds.” He decided. 

“Good idea.”

Mike returned with a damp rag and some Tylenol and water. Nicky took the pills without protest, but shied away from the washcloth. “S’cold.” He whispered. 

“Your fever’s up.” Mike said gently even as he pressed the cloth to the back of his neck. “Maybe you shouldn’t…”

Nicky groaned, shaking his head. “I can play tonight.”

“You sure? You sick, you rest.” Alex said. 

Nicky shrugged. “I wanna play.” 

Mike rolled his eyes. “You’re an idiot.” He said fondly. Followed quickly by, “hey!”, when Nicky threw the washcloth at him, getting him in the face. 

Nicky played, with his arm bandaged up and a fresh dose of Tylenol in his system. By the time the game ended, he was overdue for another dose and the bandages had to be changed again. 

“Can you drive me home?” Nicky asked, fingers hooked in Alex’s sleeve. 

“Yeah.” 

Nicky looked down, kicking his feet as the doctor cut away the old wrappings. “Can you stay?” 

Alex squeezed his hand. “Yeah.” 

Nicky nodded, closing his eyes against the sensation of the burn being exposed to cool air again. 

He didn’t talk much until they were in the car. 

“You said...you told Michael…” Nicky started, stammering a bit. “You said…you said you were in our pack now.” 

Alex felt his face going red, wondering if he’d somehow misspoken. “Yeah.”

“Did you...you mean it?” Nicky was only half looking at him, looking nervous in the passenger seat.

“Is that ok?”

“Yeah! Yes. I just...I wanted to check, since…” since it was illegal in Russia, since Alex’s family would disapprove, since it was important to be part of Nicky’s pack. Alex wasn’t sure what he was supposed to say, honestly, wasn’t sure if he was overstepping his bounds. 

“Wanna be with you. All in. Wolf stuff too.” He admitted. 

Nicky looked up at him finally, a relieved smile on his face. “Oh. Good.”

“Good?” Alex laughed, his shoulders relaxing. 

“Yeah.” Nicky smiled. “I-I like it. Like you.” His cheeks went rosy. 

“Like you too.” Alex assured him. 

“You’re sure? Even though...your family probably won’t like it.”

“They want me to be happy. You make me happy.” Alex said. “I think...everything else will be ok.” 

Nicky was smiling broadly at him, dimples showing in his cheeks. Alex kissed him at a red light.


End file.
